I guess it shouldn't come as a surprise to me that my FSH level is at 13.6. I probably should be thankful that it isn't higher. We don't know what this will mean for the future. I have to say that right now I am leaning towards trying donor eggs. Why bother to use my own eggs, if the result is most likely to be negative? If we try with my eggs first and have another negative, I don't know whether I can go through all of this again. We don't really have the funds to fund another round of multiple IVFs. We are still paying back for our adoption. It is just so frustrating that creating our family has become such a question of money. At least we hopefully will be able to use the adoption tax credit (which is refundable for the first time this year) to pay back some of our debt.
Of course, it would be nice to have a genetic relation to at least one of our children (my hubby still could have that), but it doesn't seem to make a difference in Lilli's case. I love her and she is my daughter. People always recognize that I didn't give birth to her and we knew that this would happen.
But you won't believe what kind of comments people here make all the time: "Is this your child?" Me: "Yes, this is my daughter!" "But how is this possible?" or my favorite "Why is she so dark and you so white?" I recently actually used the "Why do you want to know?" answer when a national guard woman at the airport asked me that question. Her response: "Because she is so beautiful!" didn't really make it better... Well, I guess, nobody ever sees an ugly white woman with a beautiful black child around here...
Or the triangle look how I call it. When we walk with Lilli and she is sitting in her stroller, people are looking at her, then at the person pushing the stroller (usually me or hubby), then at the person walking next to them. Next thing you see: the question marks in their eyes. Priceless!
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Friday, June 11, 2010
My dusty and rusty ovaries!
Sorry for the long abstinence. I just didn't have anything to say that I thought you might find interesting. I have mentioned here before that we were thinking about #2. I was doing more research on adoption, but it is difficult while we are overseas and we can't adopt here. Therefore we have decided to move forward with fertility treatments again.
Back on the roller coaster you could say. A friend of ours had recommended this clinic here to me that is supposedly one of the bests in the country. I thought "why not give it a try" and had finally scheduled an appointment.
Yesterday we went to this appointment. We didn't know where we were supposed to go and were running around for a while (being kicked out of an elevator once because a patient had to be transported - a weird thing that visitors and patients are transported on the same elevators) and finally found the place. It was like at the meat counter, we took a number for our doctor and then the waiting game began. We were waiting, and waiting, and waiting. After an hour no number had moved forward. I went to the reception to inquire and they told us that people had returned with numbers before ours and they had given them the time. So more waiting. Finally after about 3 hours of waiting they took us to an office. Then we had to wait again. Then we answered some questions. And waited again. Then they took us to an examination room. I had to take off (all) my clothes and put on some hospital gown. Then we were waiting again.
The doctor finally came and we talked for a while. After hearing our history, she feels we should do another IVF. But: and this is the important part. First she wants us to do tons of bloodtests. She said that because of my history there seems to be an immmunological problem with implantation and she wants to find out more about what is going on. There are two doctors that are only working on immunological issues in this clinic. She first wants me me to do the tests and then see one of the doctors to evaluate and then have another appointment with her (probably in August).
When she then looked at my ovaries (AF had arrived right before we left for the doctor - thank you very much!), she couldn't find one and the other one had only one follicle there. Not good indicators of what is to come. Why are those dusty and rusty ovaries not looking better?
I can only wonder how high my FSH level is going to be... She also said that in addition to all my female part problems (the uterus is tilted and the ovaries are somewhere completely deplaced) I now have in addition advanced maternal age. I am 36! But hey: 5 years ago, I didn't have that and I didn't get pregnant either. We'll see how it goes. Maybe they'll recommend donor eggs. I am on board if that helps us to get pregnant and give Lilli a sibling - or two.
I have always suspected that there could be an implantation problem, but am really excited that there is a doctor that actually wants to find out more about it. While researching I found an interesting article on this:
Is there anyone out there that has used Prednisone or IVIG and has had successful results with IVF after having miscarriages and/or failed IVFs before? I'd love to hear from you. Everyone else: I am still following your blogs and am happy for Sew Infertile and Cats with passports and We are what we repeatedly do for having made it to the other side! Congratulations to all of you!
Back on the roller coaster you could say. A friend of ours had recommended this clinic here to me that is supposedly one of the bests in the country. I thought "why not give it a try" and had finally scheduled an appointment.
Yesterday we went to this appointment. We didn't know where we were supposed to go and were running around for a while (being kicked out of an elevator once because a patient had to be transported - a weird thing that visitors and patients are transported on the same elevators) and finally found the place. It was like at the meat counter, we took a number for our doctor and then the waiting game began. We were waiting, and waiting, and waiting. After an hour no number had moved forward. I went to the reception to inquire and they told us that people had returned with numbers before ours and they had given them the time. So more waiting. Finally after about 3 hours of waiting they took us to an office. Then we had to wait again. Then we answered some questions. And waited again. Then they took us to an examination room. I had to take off (all) my clothes and put on some hospital gown. Then we were waiting again.
The doctor finally came and we talked for a while. After hearing our history, she feels we should do another IVF. But: and this is the important part. First she wants us to do tons of bloodtests. She said that because of my history there seems to be an immmunological problem with implantation and she wants to find out more about what is going on. There are two doctors that are only working on immunological issues in this clinic. She first wants me me to do the tests and then see one of the doctors to evaluate and then have another appointment with her (probably in August).
When she then looked at my ovaries (AF had arrived right before we left for the doctor - thank you very much!), she couldn't find one and the other one had only one follicle there. Not good indicators of what is to come. Why are those dusty and rusty ovaries not looking better?
I can only wonder how high my FSH level is going to be... She also said that in addition to all my female part problems (the uterus is tilted and the ovaries are somewhere completely deplaced) I now have in addition advanced maternal age. I am 36! But hey: 5 years ago, I didn't have that and I didn't get pregnant either. We'll see how it goes. Maybe they'll recommend donor eggs. I am on board if that helps us to get pregnant and give Lilli a sibling - or two.
I have always suspected that there could be an implantation problem, but am really excited that there is a doctor that actually wants to find out more about it. While researching I found an interesting article on this:
Is there anyone out there that has used Prednisone or IVIG and has had successful results with IVF after having miscarriages and/or failed IVFs before? I'd love to hear from you. Everyone else: I am still following your blogs and am happy for Sew Infertile and Cats with passports and We are what we repeatedly do for having made it to the other side! Congratulations to all of you!
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