Don't trust the cops

Of course all my venting before the trip was exaggerated. The first day was not so bad after all. We arrived at my BIL's house yesterday around 4:30 p.m. after sitting in traffic for what felt like a real long time. It actually took us about an hour to drive about 5 miles. The HOV lane didn't really help either. While we were overtaking a lot of cars first, cars started to pile up at the end of the HOV lane and of course it took forever.

We went to BIL's house and our nephew was cute as hell. He is not shy with his smiles. My MIL said to dh: "Give him to Yoka, so she can hold him. I can't wait until you get one of your own." This is the thing. She didn't realize how hurtful her comment was for me. She doesn't understand that we don't know when we'll have one of our own. It can take a freaking long time. And I know that she didn't want to hurt me. This is the thing about infertility. People make comments and don't even realize how much it hurts. And infertility makes you so sensitive to every single thing they say.

We went to my FIL's restaurant after that to say hi and ate a little something. We returned to my BIL's house after that and had a really nice evening. SIL made her famous macaroni and cheese and we had a nice conversation. They asked us about the adoption process and how long it was going to take. I wish I knew that. This is the thing: it is an equation with so many unknowns. I wish I knew when we will be done with our home study. I wish I knew when we will be done with our profile. I wish I knew if and when a birthmother might pick us.

The fingerprints are taken. the guardianship agreement is signed, notarized, and in the mail from our friends back to us. But of course it will arrive when we are not home. We'll have to wait until we come home to send it back to the agency.

My MIL brought the missing paperwork from NY for the home study. We mailed the rest of the paperwork on Friday night. When I went to pick up our mail, my driving record had arrived. I put that in the mail as well.

My driving recorded showed that I had a conviction for driving with an unlicensed vehicle. That happened in July. We had just gotten back from Europe and DH had to go down to Houston. I drove him to the airport in his car (it is technically his car because he bought it and my name is not on the title). On my way back home I was stopped by a cop. That was the first time that I was ever stopped in the US and I was pretty shocked. Virginia had just introduced the new law for reckless driving. I didn't think I had been going to fast, but who knows? The cop told me that he had stopped me because our license plates were expired. Great! I didn't even know that they do expire. Here I was, a foreigner sitting in hubbies car not knowing which papers I needed to hand to the cop. I only claim it is our car, if it is convenient. If the car has to go to the shop, it is usually his car. I tried crying. That didn't help. Being blond didn't help either. He was a mean, mean cop. He told me then it was just a paper offense and I shouldn't worry about it. He immediately gave me a court date. I was shocked. In Europe you don't have to go to court for a traffic ticket. The cop made me promise to take care of it the next day. He said if I could prove it to him in court, he would see that he could do for me. Needless to say that I had it all taken care of the next day (while my hubbie was in Houston, he never seems to be around for inconvenient business). I then thought, I will go to court and it will be alright. The cop will help me, he promised me.

I went to the court a couple of weeks later. It was kind of an interesting cultural experience. I had never been to a court in the U.S. before. I looked around for the officer and had asked other officers for him. He was not there. Great. When the judge called me, I went to the front. She asked me whether I was guilty of driving with expired license plates. I said "Yes. But I took care of it the next day." She reduced the fine to $10. I was really relieved. But when I went to pay, I had to pay the administrative fees as well and ended up with $75 less on our bank account. What do we learn from that experience? You can't even trust cops in this country.

DH plans to write his biography while we are down here. And tomorrow, we'll copy his driving record and mail it to the agency. Have I mentioned it was as white as a piece of paper?

Today we drove to the restaurant for breakfast and now it is 2:30 p.m. and we are still here. DH is playing darts with his dad. I know that he needs this time, but I am more or less bored here. I was doing a Soduko earlier and read blogs, but now I am starting to get really, really bored. It is always the same when we come here. We hang out at the restaurant all day and then we go out for dinner. But it is raining anyway, so who cares?